In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.