Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
