They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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