She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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