I just cut my nipple shaving
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize