i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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