No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
