This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
