Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
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i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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