I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
