You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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