I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
