i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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