Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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