I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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