i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize