I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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