dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
