no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
