we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Even my vagina gasped.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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