That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize