You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
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