i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
