Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
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It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
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i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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