Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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