I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
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I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
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It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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