im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
