She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
