A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
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