There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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