In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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