Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
