Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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