Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize