you mean i was at the winter classic?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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