names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
