ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
it hurts more in the daytime
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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