cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
