sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
