Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Threesome in a minivan. New low
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
