That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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