even my farts smell like vagina
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I need to align my fucking chakras
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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