note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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