Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize