Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.

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  (727): i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR. http://tfl.nu/oyj0
  Replies (16) Good night (13802) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i turned job hunting into a drinking game..

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  (651): i turned job hunting into a drinking game.. http://tfl.nu/xroj
  Replies (20) Good night (5851) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.

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  (617): When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner. http://tfl.nu/g7ai
  Replies (5) Good night (6233) Bad night (1439)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.

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  (615): The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted. http://tfl.nu/wtc2
  Replies (4) Good night (3203) Bad night (1031)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.

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  (817): I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number. http://tfl.nu/dwaz
  Replies (1) Good night (2793) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.

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  (909): I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment. http://tfl.nu/mic1
  Replies (1) Good night (1137) Bad night (2025)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride

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  (973): Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride http://tfl.nu/vufa
  Replies (23) Good night (5260) Bad night (1362)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN

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  (301): Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN http://tfl.nu/2m0y
  Replies (17) Good night (2059) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?

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  (323): Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you? http://tfl.nu/qb3x
  Replies (26) Good night (895) Bad night (2479)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.

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  (330): He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet. http://tfl.nu/wg57
  Replies (5) Good night (954) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.

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  (847): I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying. http://tfl.nu/v59j
  Replies (4) Good night (1342) Bad night (691)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with

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  (618): Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with http://tfl.nu/wwss
  Replies (4) Good night (1250) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.

  (1-360): View more from Washington

  Bringing families together since 1987

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  (360): I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis. (1-360): Bringing families together since 1987 http://tfl.nu/o9ey
  Replies (2) Good night (612) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on

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  (405): Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on http://tfl.nu/n0jv
  Replies (4) Good night (243) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.

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  (212): It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy. http://tfl.nu/fsqc
  Replies (0) Good night (800) Bad night (319)

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