Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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