I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
