ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
