I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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