im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I don't deserve a penis
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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