there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
