Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
